Essential Modern Cloak-Room Attendant Skills: 01 Cobbling.

It is essential for prospective Modern Cloak-Room Attendants to develop a skill set appropriate to the many and varied challenges of todays modern cloak-room environment.

For example yesterday a guest, slightly 'worse for wear', caught and snapped the heel of her shoe in a heating grate.
Oh calamity!
The disco dancing had yet to begin and the forlorn guest stood at my window and wailed,
"'av just caught mi fackin' 'eel in your poxy fackin' grate and look at my fackin' shoe nary!"

"Fear not madam for I am a Modern Cloak-Room Attendant and have developed an appropriate skill set."
"Wot yew fackin' on abart?"
"Cobblers madam."
"You watch y'friggin' marf you, donncha know oo I yam pal? Me an' Charles paid good money to come up dis gaff an' I don't need no smart-gobbed git tellin' me it's cobblers."
"Cobblers mend shoes madam"
"Oh yeah arseole? Where y'gonna get a bleedin' cobbler this time o'night then?"

I digress...

So, in this circumstance an application of "Super Glue" saved the day:

And so Cinderella had the shoe she had so carelessly broken mended by a Modern Cloak-Room Attendant masquerading as a cobbler and went to the ball after all.

My God! donncha jus 'ate bleedin' riff-raff?

The Place Where "Sea Girt" Used To Be.

I was in our local (in)convenience shop the other morning, behind the counter 'S' was having a bit of a rant about a new development that was beginning to rob the sunlight from her little garden.

A while ago I took a picture of the building that occupied the space:

Sea Girt

Although I can't say for certain, I'm sure 'Sea Girt' was based on two railway carriages placed side by side.
When it came up for sale I was almost tempted to start playing the lottery on the slim off-chance I might win and be able to afford to buy the building.

It was sold with planning permission for a 3 or 4 story development.
I walked past the site today which now looks like this:

I think I really preferred the original building and wonder about the future for the rest of the area:

Time will tell.

I advised 'S' about how she should make her concerns known to the local planning authority (I used to be a local councillor) but my feeling is it's now to late to do anything.

HRH Charles Prince of Wales Bears Witness No. 01: The Momart Warehouse Fire.

His Royal Highness The Prince Charles Philip Arthur George, Prince of Wales and Earl of Chester, Duke of Cornwall, Duke of Rothesay, Earl of Carrick, Baron of Renfrew, Lord of the Isles, Prince and Great Steward of Scotland, Knight Companion of the Most Noble Order of the Garter, Knight of the Most Ancient and Most Noble Order of the Thistle, Great Master and First and Principal Knight Grand Cross of the Most Honourable Order of the Bath, Member of the Order of Merit, Knight of the Order of Australia, Companion of the Queen's Service Order, Honorary Member of the Saskatchewan Order of Merit, Chief Grand Commander of the Order of Logohu, Member of Her Majesty's Most Honourable Privy Council, Aide-de-Camp to Her Majesty bears witness to the immolation of the work of, amongst others, the Blessed St. Emin of Margate in the Momart warehouse fire 24th of May 2004.