Sunday 18 September 2011

Cardboard Reality Interventions 2011: 261

Felpham 18/09/11:

Looking at this intervention moves me to type another explanation.

It's sometime in the early 1980's
My mate, W, used to be an Adam and the Ants Fan but ditched 'em went they went main stream.
He had the word 'ANTS' in studs across the back of his leather jacket.
He took the studs out but 'ANTS' was still clearly visible from the holes left behind.
We were in a notorious drinking den that purported to be a 'Sports & Social Club'.
We were in the cave like celler room where bands played.
Access was via a narrow artexed passage with a wrought iron gate at the entrance.
Me and 'W' were getting hammered.

I didn't notice the trouble brewing, I didn't notice that the focus of the impending storm was the word ANTS on the back of W's jacket but W had picked up on it and did one.
The gang chased after him, down the passage toward the exit, only to find that the door man had closed the gate after W had shot through it.

I ran out behind the gang hoping W and me might stand a chance against them in the open.
I ran straight into the frustrated gang.

'U AN ANT THEN?'

I distinctly remember saying 'I beg your pardon' before the first blow arrived.
I instantly lashed out in retaliation even though I had a blinding white light in my head.
I booted someone fair and square in the cobblers but turned full face to a bloke that 'nutted' me I hit the floor and got a 5 man pounding.

Bust the orbital under my left eye, fat lip and lots of bruising.

Just in the wrong place at the wrong time.


6 comments:

Wartime Housewife said...

Might I direct you to the work of Scroobius Pip which goes some way to addressing the subject of blind allegiances (among other things).

http://youtu.be/yoN6XfyQsr4

OutaSpaceMan said...

Track of the week and it's only Monday.

Sadly some of the people I'd really like to share this with would switch off as soon as they recognised what they believe to be 'rap'.

I have a sort of feeling this is folk music.

I suspect you'll understand why I'm indifferent to the reported re-formation of Adam & the Ants.

(Which will essentially be Marco & the Ant-being himself).

Wartime Housewife said...

Isn't Mr Ant a bit fragile to be playing pop stars again? Should we speak to him do you think?

And yes, I agree, I think Mr Pip IS folk - of the neo-troubadour variety. How many times does one get to use the phrase 'neo-troubadour' in everyday conversation? God I'm good.

OutaSpaceMan said...

I shall drop 'neo-troubadour' into casual conversation at the very next fashionable cock-tail party I attend.

Banished To A Pompous Land said...

The Wellie! Those were the days our kid.

I feel some mention is merited for the groovy DJ stylings of Mr Whitelock and the many threats of violence that they prompted.

Are you there Nodrog?

OutaSpaceMan said...

The 'Wellie' indeed.
The night I remember it was full of 'Syds & Biffas" long after the 'cool' period when Mr. W. (The Alarming Clock) 'spun the wax'.
I'd forgotten the first rule of self-defence, 'don't put yourself in a high risk situation' but I was thristy.

I'm reminded of the unique aroma of the toilet facilities.
The toilets in Trainspotting were a palace by comparison.