Thursday, 15 April 2010

Manly Pursuits No. 08: Performing A Ritual Offering Of Old Underpants To The Gods Of The Sea.

A little while ago I was invited to take part in a survey about my experiences and opinions on training.
This involved a short interview for which I was rewarded with a voucher worth £30 to spend at Marks and Spencers.
(Here's the formula for this process: me - dignity = cash)

I used the vouchers to purchase 6 pairs of underpants.

I'm dismayed by the lack of meaningful rituals in this modern world so used my old underpants, surely the garments most infused with the essence of my being, to perform this right.

There now, the Gods of the Sea have been placated and I shall reap the bounty of the ocean for the coming twelve month.


Anonymous said...

when i lived in brighton i had a tiny garden and an old and broken metal wheelbarrow where i used to carry out ritual burnings. mostly it was pictures and letters and the occasional book or record cover. i used to choose the accompanying music very carefully.
see - it's not just a man thing.
love jane

Herr Döktor said...

I tried that with a 'Star Trek' novel.

It worked, I've never read another one again.

OutaSpaceMan said...

Now then,

I don't wish to infer that this is a 'male' thing and, in fact, would suggest that it is, probably, a more 'female' ritual.

(A good proportion of my previous existence was expunged by dint of my ex-wife burning all trace of it.)

Herr Doktor, being an illuminated sort of a chap, knows the power of this type of ritual and has demonstrated it's powerful cleansing effect.