Another Sign of The Time.

My first experiment in clock construction fired my imagination.
I sped off to our local art supply shop to buy a quartz clock movement.
"That'll be £5.65... sir."
I left the shop a bit down-hearted but then had one of those rare moments of clarity and hit the charity shops.
Within half an hour I had 3 clocks and had paid no more than £1.50 for any of them.
Just looking at the picture above I realise that I'm going to have to adjust the '7' indicator.

Cardboard Reality Interventions 2011: No. 75

Oving 10/03/11:

My 'Track of the Week": 'Mack the Knife' (Performed by Lotte Lenya)

Written by Kurt Weill for his wife Lotte Lenya.

Sounds even more scary in the original German.

Cardboard Reality Interventions 2011: No. 74

Reality Bites Back
This series of 'instruction' interventions was created and put in place on the 10th of March.
I'd been working on a new song which contained a line I really liked and I decided it would become CRI No. 74.

At 2:46 (JST) on the 11th of March an 8.9/9.0 magnitude earthquake hit the Pacific Ocean off the Northeasten coastal region of Japan which caused a devastating tsunami.
Because I don't watch television and don't read newspapers I was unaware of the disaster until the 12th of March when I saw the details on a discarded newspaper in a restaurant.

I have deliberated about the wisdom of posting this intervention as I didn't want it to be seen as either crass or, trying to make some kind of flippant comment on the terrible situation the victims now find themselves in and, given the situation at the nuclear power plants, may effect many more.

This intervention is dedicated to the people of Japan.

Tangmere Airfield (disused) 10/03/11:

Our New Kitchen: Stage 05 (Complete)

Two small cupboards, an extractor and an exciting silver pipe.
We're back in gear.
The exciting silver pipe is causing us a bit of head-scratching.
It's still only half the length it will eventually be when it reaches the hole in the wall
We both like it.
It's shiny and we like shiny things but what will our friends think of us if we leave it exposed?

Sod what anybody else thinks.
It's our kind of 'feature'.

An Innocent Pastime.

Mr Glyn Webster at The Pavillion of Innocent Pastimes picks up the ball and runs with it:

I thoroughly approve of this intervention.

Cardboard Reality Interventions 2011: No. 73

Tangmere 10/03/11:

Sign Of The Time.

I found a broken kitchen clock in a bin today.
What else could I do but save it?

I'm tempted to buy some different hands for it but wonder to myself if that would spoil it's integrity.

Cardboard Reality Interventions 2011: No. 72

Westergate 10/03/11:

Cardboard Reality Interventions 2011: No. 71

Shripney 10/03/11:

Cardboard Reality Interventions 2011: No. 70

Shripney 10/03/11:

I'm In The Mood For Love (Fields/McHugh) Performed By O.S.M. B:53 With Incidental SFX By Linda On The Nintendo Wii

This is the song I wish I'd written.

I've based my version on Lord Tanamo's 'I'm In The Mood For Ska'.
Dedicated to all the ladies in my mailing list (and Linda).

Cardboard Reality Interventions 2011: No. 69

Ford 05/03/11:

"The Road To" series is dedicated to Mr. Frank Key.

Our New Kitchen: Stage 04 (Complete)

Part of what made this project a possibility was the donation of the cabinets by a friend of Linda's friend June.
All well and good.
That is until we try to fit them into our kitchen space.
The flat was built in the 1930's and the dimensions are somewhat at odds with those required of today's modern fitted kitchen which wouldn't necessarily be a problem if the cabinets weren't also a non-standard size.

The doors that came with the cabinets are not attractive but we blithely thought that all we had to do was march into B&Q, select a set of doors more to our taste and then attach them to the cabinets.
Oh, folly, folly.
So, the compromise plan is to have the ugly doors sprayed pale blue to contrast with the work-surface.

The next problem.
Because the cabinets are an odd size we can't get any of them to fit in the corners which will leave big gaps.
The compromise solution is to use the money we saved by not buying replacement doors to have a cabinet-maker build a couple of units to fill in the odd gaps.
All I have to do now is find the cabinet-maker.

The cutlery draw will, when fitted, have about a third of it's length obscured by the worktop.

I can't find a compromise solution to this so I've decided to live with it.

Ever tried to walk into an electrical goods retail outlet with the intention of walking out with a cooker-hood?
Dream on.
I visited 6 different stores before I found one that actually had a hood in stock.
The compromise here being that I wanted one in stainless steel but ended up with a white (Bosch) model.

Today's good news is that the sink, with it's fantastic new tap, has been installed and it doesn't leak anywhere!
I've tested it by having a marathon washing up session which went very well.
The draining board has changed from the right-hand side to the left leading me to the discovery that I'd been washing up left-handed for about 12 years.

This evening Linda prepared a roast chicken dinner and proclaimed that the work-surface area is to her requirements.
(Preparation of Linda's never less than delicious meals require every pot, pan and cooking utensil to be scattered randomly around the kitchen regardless of necessity to the process.)

Of course, non of these problems would have arisen if I'd designed the kitchen, oh no.

Our New Kitchen: Stages 02 & 03 (Complete)

As our kitchen progresses it will be noted that I have had very little 'creative' input on the project.
This condition has been imposed by Linda who wants a sensible cooking environment rather than my vision of what a kitchen could be.
I've found her demands difficult to argue with.

Stage 02:

Electrics in, sink unit fitted:

Stage 03:

Work surfaces installed:

Sadly it turns out that the units are not a standard size and adjustments will have to be made to the design.
Oh hum.

Cardboard Reality Interventions 2011: No. 68

Flansham 05/03/11:

Cardboard Reality Interventions 2011: No. 67

Flansham 05/03/11:

Cardboard Reality Interventions 2011: No. 66

Flansham 05/03/11:

Cardboard Reality Interventions 2011: No. 65

Felpham 05/03/11:

Our New Kitchen: Stage 01 (Complete)

So, it took me three hours to completely remove, bag up and take the partition wall to the tip.
Believe it or not, and despite all the excitingly live electrical cables hanging out of the walls, the kitchen is greatly improved already.
The whole process was achieved with very little swearing and only one small cut to the index finger of my right hand (surprisingly large amount of blood though).
The most unpleasant aspect of the work was removing all the ancient greasy filth that had accumulated behind all the fittings.

I expected to be able to say "it makes the room look bigger" but it doesn't.
Odd that.